Some of you already do it, some of you might dream about doing it, but most of you thank God above that there is no possibility of it ever becoming a reality. I'm referring to working side by side with your spouse. And unfortunately, I'm not talking about spending the weekend in the front yard pruning your crape myrtles! I'm referring to your job.
In the professional world, strong, motivated women usually reveal their alter egos, which usually is the exact opposite of their demeanor at home. Years of working our way up that career ladder has shaped the personality that we have come to embody in the workplace. That side is the ambitious woman that suits up every morning in her dress slacks and pumps, swallows her coffee and Centrum one-a-day, and heads out the door and off to her other life, her career. In the process, she sheds her nurturing, feminine personality while simultaneously putting her determined game face on for the remainder of the work day.
Being apart from your husband all day makes you (and him) cherish that time you spend away from each other. Not only because it makes you even more excited to come home to him every night, but also because he usually only sees the (overall) patient, nurturing side of your personality. You like the fact that he doesn't see your dominant, professional side. Call me old fashioned, but i believe it's no secret that every woman wants their husband to view them in a tender, soft focus light.
But, for us women who do spend the working day with the apple of our eye, (no sarcasm intended, I swear!) they've seen our alter ego, you know, the assertive leader in us who sets high standards for her employees as well as her organization(for those of you in a supervisory role). And if you are like me and work closely with your man (husband and wife owned company and only one office apart), the constant contact and communication can drastically increase conflict and irritation, way more than the average day to day spousal exchanges.
So when you are finally back at home, how do you make the transition from the aggressive business mindset back to the traditional husband and wife role?
No doubt, it will always be a constant struggle. Fortunately for the mister and me, we have discovered a solution that works for us. We've decided that the best way for us to transition back into our domestic roles is to, (A) on the drive home via cellphone, discuss the highs and lows of the work day, hash out any indifferences, and (B) end that conversation the second we pull into the driveway(or not get out of car until we do!) and vow to put all work related issues off until the next day during business hours. Then once we've walked in the door, we shed our business attire along with our alter egos, and settle in for our evening activities. Those activities for us include dinner, taking our Rottweiler for a walk, and snuggling up together to watch our nightly T.V. shows. All the while, allowing ourselves to relax back into our cherished titles of Mr. And Mrs., or as we like to consider it, best friends and devoted lovers.
Admittedly, it's a difficult and seemingly impossible task at times to turn off those mindsets. Yet, we both know it is extremely vital for the health and well being of not only ourselves but our marriage as well. So my advice for all you couples out there that are blessed to also work together; actively continue to put effort into keeping your work life separate from your home life. Set clear and specific boundaries and uphold those boundaries with fierce adamancy.
Practice makes perfect and soon it will be second nature. Always remember that the bond you share with your husband should always take priority over business matters. No exceptions!
